First dates can bring so much potential and excitement, but there’s also a lot that can go wrong. Last week, a woman walked away from a first date in under two minutes after realizing the situation felt humiliating to her.

In her now-viral TikTok video, Rachel Anderson recounted how her date had asked her to dress comfortably and “act like it’s a lounge day at home.” Things quickly took an ugly turn when she was surprised by a fine dining restaurant. The 35-year-old woman “turned around and walked out.”

Anderson arrived dressed casually with her “hair in a bun, no jewelry, no nothing,” taking him at his word. 

@rachelanderson471♬ original sound – Rachel Anders🩵n

She quickly recognized that her date’s attempt to embarrass her was the ultimate wake-up call. Social media users have applauded Anderson for rapidly establishing a line between dating etiquette and red flags. One user commented under the video, “Ladies, this is leaving at the First red flag.”

The video captioned, “First date lasted less than two minutes,” has already gained close to a million views at the time of writing, with over 160K likes. 

According to the TikTok user, she immediately left the date, grabbed some fast food, and blocked the man right away, without any message or explanation. 

What stood out more to Anderson was how differently her 37-year-old date showed up. She recalled her date dressed “appropriately,” in a “white button down, navy dress pants and dress shoes.” Anderson “was shocked” by how he presented himself as opposed to how she was advised to. 

Anderson rhetorically asked in her video, “Why does this man try to walk me into a fine dining restaurant?” She added, “I immediately knew. I turned around and walked out.” The TikTok user called it a “power play” by her date, made to embarrass and unnerve her intentionally. 

She said, “As soon as you meet me, you want to level the playing field by humbling and or embarrassing me by bringing me out to a place where you know that I am underdressed?” As she affirmed, “Absolutely not.” 

Instead of sticking around for an explanation, Anderson turned around and walked away. In follow-up comments, she clarified why she didn’t question her instincts at the time. 

Anderson shared coming out of a long-term marriage and spending a long time rebuilding her sense of self. In a later comment, she noted, “I’ve worked hard on pouring into myself these last couple of years after coming out of a nightmare 2-decade-long marriage.”

She contrasted her reaction with how she might have handled the situation in the past. Anderson said, “Old me would have tried to figure out why. I would have messaged him.” 

Instead, she took the instant at face value. “You showed me who you were; you don’t have to show me twice,” she said. “You will never, ever have the opportunity to try to humble me again.”

Many women seem to resonate with the video, who recognized the cynical behavior in men they had the misfortune to encounter. One user noted, “He was testing you to see if he could control you.” While another sighed, “This is diabolical. They hate us.” Anderson replied to comments about men’s behavior, noting: “They absolutely hate us, but won’t just leave us alone, I’ll never understand it!”

Anderson counts the failed humiliation stunt as personal growth. She reflected on how long it took her to stop spelling out moments that made her uncomfortable. In another comment, she wrote, “It took me a minute to get here, but I have arrived!”